Sinanaide
by labella yuki
Summary: who is this boy, and what is he saying. i don't understand him at all. i have this strange feeling when i see him, could he be the key to my memory loss?
1. prologue

"_sinanaide! Onegai sinanaide. Sa mabuta o akete, onegai!"_

_Who? Who is it that is yelling so frantically? I dont understand what their saying._

"_Usagi-san! Hitori ni sinaide! Usagi-san"_

_What a sad voice, poort hing. If only i could understand you, if only i could reach you. You sound like you're crying and it makes my heart ache. Everything is so dark, my body feels so heavy. I feel like i just need to sleep._

**I don't own anything !**

**Note: I will use some japanese in my story. so please keep in mind that I'm NOT Japanese, nor do I speak the language. so yes the words are probably a bit (*coughs* a lot) worng. please don't hate me for it, also I will give a translation at the bottom. working in order from the top to the bottom of the page which contains the story.**

**translation:**

**don't die! please don't die, so/come open your eyes, please!**

**Usagi-san! don't leave me alone! Usagi-san**


	2. Chapter 1

**Usagi-san**

I open my eyes and stare at white celling. Were am I? is this a hospital? Yes indeed it is.

Slowly I push myself up. My head trobs and my body achs all over. Finally seated I look down and see that I am covered in bandages. Theres an iv in my arm, and a heart monitor attached to my chest.

The room is small and clean. There is my hospital bed, a nightstand and a chair. Which is occupied by a young, sleeping boy. The boy doesn't look older then 20, has Brown hair and is quite small. He is sleeping so I can't see his eyes, but I can tell from his face alone that he has been crying, and has not been sleeping.

I wonder, now that I'm in the hospital, were my familie is. Not that I care that much about my parents, and I couldn't care less for my brother.

Light falls in through the curtains, which are slightly open. the light falls directly on the sleeping boys face. I hadn't notice before, but with a second look, he is beautiful. I don't know why, but as the boy starts to wake up, I am reminded of a cute little angel. He opens his eyes, they are big and have a color i have only heard form in books. Green emerald eyes, shining in the light. The boy just looks average, nothing special, so why am I so drawn to him? Why can't I deny that he is beautiful?

Just who is he ?

"Usagi-san?" the boy says sluggishly. What is that suppose to mean, Usagi-san. It sounds like my name, but my name is Usami, not Usagi-something. Besides who is this kid that apperantly knows my name?

"Usagi-san, yogata. Mezameta Usagi-san." The boy speaks, but I don't understand anything of it.

"ano, Usagi-san…." He says. Wow, he looks like he's about to cry. "gomenasai, watashi no sede. Gomen" tears form in the corner of his eyes.

No, No I don't want him to cry. Why, he looks jusst like a broken doll, a broken angel. He looks like what he is, a broken boy.

I stay quiet even though I have a few words I want to say. I'm afraid we won't understand each other when speaking.

"Usagi-san?" he is voice sound curious, he is probably asking a question. "Usagi-san, daijobu? Naze anata wa kotaenai ?" that's a question, for sure, but thats all I know.

"hontoni gomenasai, dakara koteiro Usagi-san. Watashi kiraiwanaide." He's sobbing now.

"please stop" I am shocked even by my own voice. The boy looks up at me now I have spoken.  
"please stop, don't cry. I'm sorry, but I don't understand what your saying. Do you understand me?" the boy only looks confused at me. He doesn't know what I'm saying either.

he takes a step back and just keeps staring at me with disbelieve.

"can you tell me your name? N-a-m-e" I try to spell it out for him, but he just shakes his head.

"well, I call you angel for now, since that's the first thing that came to my mind." I mumble to myself, not that is matters, Angel can't even understand me.

The boy moves away. The smile he had when he woke up, has completely faded during our conversation. Then he turns around and runs out of the room. He stops in the hallway, so I can still hear him yell.

"sensei, onegai, Usagi- janai Usami-san o Testsudau." The boy finally says my name. So my guess about Usagi being a nickname was correct. I wonder if he is calling a docter.

Then a docter does enter. However when the boy walks in, backwards by the way, he has stopped crying. He looks rather shocked. Following him is my father and my annoying brother. Well atleast he visits, even if it's by force of my father.

"father, what happend to me?" I ask him. Then everybody is quiet and looks shocked at me.

"kioku soshitsu" the man in the long white coat, whom I presume is the docter, says.

Then my father steps forward. "My son, you had an accident." He tells me.

"what, but I don't remeber anything at all." I tell him. He frowns

"I know that. it appears you have memory lose. I just have to asks you. Right now you're speaking english. Can you speak any other language?" he asks, this time I frown. "no I don't" is my relpy.

I look around the room and see my brother talking to the little Angel. Angel clearly seems upset. The docter has already left the room, why I can't really guess. I'm to tired and I don't really care what the docter does. My father turns around towards my brother and Angel. He says something, quite a lot, but I don't know the grammar of the language they're speaking, so I could be just a few words. My brother just nods takes out his phone and starts calling. My father continues to give the boy a stern look and then speaks again making a hand movement along with it.

Hurtful or upsetting words are said. Tears, again. Angel is crying. What is happening? what was said? Why are they upsetting, why is my father upsetting such a cute angel? He cries uncontrolably, it hurts my heart. I want to do something, but I can't

"Nani ga okoru." The boy starts. "watashi wa itsumo Usagi-san sukidesu." He says those words with such determination, even though he is crying.

* * *

**Translations: (everything in toghether with no 'enter' in between is on sentence or one piece that belongs together)**

**"**_**Usagi-san, yogata. Mezameta Usagi-san." **_**Usagi-san, thank heavens(/god), your awake**

**"**_**ano, Usagi-san…."**_** Uhm, Usagi-san.**

**"**_**gomenasai, watashi no sede. Gomen" **_**I am sorry. It's my fault I'm sorry**

**"**_**Usagi-san, daijobu? Naze anata wa kotaenai**_** ?" Usagi-san, are you alright? Why aren't you answering?**

**"**_**hontoni gomenasai, dakara koteiro Usagi-san. Watashi kiraiwanaide." **_**I am really sorry, thats why answer Usagi-san, don't hate me**

**"**_**sensei, onegai, Usagi- janai Usami-san o Testsudau" **_**Docter, please help. Usagi- no Usami-san**

_**"Nani ga okoru**_**. no matter/whatever what happens**

_**"watashi wa itsumo Usagi-san sukidesu." I will alway love Usagi-san**_

**thank you for reading**

**-Yuki**


	3. Chapter 2

'I can't believe it, Usagi-san has memory loss' Misaki is lost in his thoughts as he entered the apartment they shared.

it has been two days since Usagi-san woke up in the hospital room. A little after the author had woken up, he started talking. All of the words he spoke, Misaki didn't understand, like the man was speaking a different language.

Indeed he was. After Usagi-chichi and Usagi-ani, A.K.A. Fuyuhiko and Haruhiko had entered, Haruhiko had explained Misaki that he was speaking in english and translated it for Misaki.

As well as the docter's report said, it was very clear Usagi-san had lost his memories. Not just a few, but nearly is entire life. he believed he was still a young boy, living in England. Every japanese word is lost for him.

There is a change he can get his memories back, but when that will happen and _If_ that will happen, the docters couldn't say. Misaki didn't understand much the docter was telling him anyway. He just couldn't wrap his head around the idea the Usagi-san, the one man that always clinged to him, has completely forgotten about him.

Not just him, or the things they did together, but everyone he met here in Japan. Aikawa, Takahiro even Isaka. He had forgotten about books he wrote, about his high school live, everything.

And that hurt. to think something they had so strongly, especially for Usagi-san, would be forgotten in a blink of an eye. The worst thing of all, Fuyuhiko told him to leave.

"leave, you will only confuse him more. Think about his health." Though Misaki agreed with that he still didn't want to leave Usagi-san. Of course his presence could bring damage to Akihiko, he was the one the most in his live the past years, he was the one that held Usagi's heart. so in the end Misaki could only agree.

Only why did he have to leave completely? That was a mystery for Misaki. Fuyuhiko had told him to pack his stuff and leave, move out of the apartment. As soon as possible of was told that Usagi-san would move back home. There would be attended with someone that can translate japanese for him, and he would learn to speak japanese again.

Misaki wasn't allowed to see him.

So here he was, packing his stuff. He took his time, but in the end he didn't have much stuff. He never had much stuff anyway. He never needed anything, because Usagi-san had his house filled. Misaki is just plain Misaki. Not much, but yet a lot.

Misaki walked through the house. He walked around the living room, passed by the kitchen and dinning table. He remebers all the times Usagi-san wanted to take him right there. Saying things like "i'm out of Misaki." Or "you look to cute for your own good." Misaki blushes at the memory alone, he doesn't dare to guess how much was blushing when it happend.

Walking through the hallway, were Usagi-san would drag him through just to get to the bedroom faster. Misaki always struggeld, now he regrets it, just a tiny little bit, but it's still regret.

Not all places in the house reminded Misaki of dirty things he did with Usagi-san. As of fact he is blushing madly thinking about those looks at the balcony, this is were he once confesed his love for Usagi-san. It was also the place were Usagi-san showed a incredible sad face, because Misaki was leaving to stay with his brother.

Misaki makes his way up stairs. There, in the hall, he remebered kissing Usagi-san and congratulating him with winning an award. Misaki so much wanted to take the upper hand, but in the end it was Usagi-san doing the whole show. The teen madly blushes again.

so many memories, but he's the only one capable of remembering them.

it's Time to leave. Misaki makes his way downstairs again. he finished packing and finished sayong goodbye. replaying the past somehow made Misaki smile veen though it makes him sad as well. He grabs his bag and goes downstairs.

Misaki looks around one last time, he actually really wants to take a small reminder with him. Something for himself. he won't steal it, just borrow. Maybe have an excuse to at least see Usagi-san and see how he is doing, when he returns this item.

Misaki walks upstairs again, towards the bear-room. Usagi-san has many Susuki-san's. of course the big one, but also a lot of smaller ones. Misaki takes a small one as reminder and as hope to hold on to, until Usagi-san himself remembers.

Downstairs Misaki is just about to leave as he hears the frontdoor slamming. Suddenly Misaki feels as if he is trespassing. In panic he drops everything. all his stuff spreads over the living room floor. Quickly he starts recollecting his stuff.

And indeed the door to the livingroom is opened and a nothing suspecting butler sees Misaki, Who he thought wouldn't be here. Along with the butler are Haruhiko and Akihiko. Misaki gasps as he sees his lover he's been remembering for the past minutes while walking around the house. The man just doesn't remember him.

But everybody, not just the butler is surprised to see him.

"….." Akihiko says something, but Misaki doesn't understand.

Haruhiko simply replies to his brother, they understand each other just fine and that makes him kind of jelaous. Misaki wanders what they are talking about. If only there wasn't a language barrier, then he would be able to understand them.

Tanaka notices the face Misaki is wearing and Straight away he acts like a translator, but is stopped before he can translate anything for Misaki.

"no need for it. go help Akihiko, i'll talk to Misaki." Haruhiko steps towards Misaki. The butler simply does as he is told.

"what are you doing here?" Haruhiko asks.

"Well, I just came to pick up my stuff. That's all." Misaki replies. He looks over at Usagi-san. The man is standing so close yet so far away.

Usagi-san seems to notice Misaki's stare. He looks at the boy, and then speaks to his butler. If only Misaki could remember Sebastian's real name. if only Akihiko rememberd. ooh if only none of this happened. if he could have just been more carefull.

Haruhiko notices the stares of Misaki towards his brother as well. "can't you come pick up your stuff some other time." He finally speaks to Misaki, taking the boy back to reality.

"I'm already done." He says. "then, I'll be leaving." Misaki bows his head and walks away. He opens the door and walks away, away form Usagi-san.

'please, soon remember me again, Usagi-san.' The boy thinks to himself, more like he prays to anyone to hear him.

Haruhiko decides to follow Misaki. The boy had a sad look on his face, and prehaps this is a great change for Haruhiko himself. He walks to the two man still standing in the apartment.

In japanese he speaks. "I will be waiting outside. lead him around a bit, see if he can remember anything. just untill he wants to leave. Don't tell him about Misaki, if he asks about the boy you don't say a word, understand?" He says. The butler only nods, while Akihiko just looks confused.

He is learning japanese, but still it's difficult for him and his half-brother didn't speak any easy words, only the formal speach Akihiko hasn't learned about. hell, he doesn't even know about the existence of that formal speach. what he has learned and what he remebers, are just some simple words.

"what did my brother say?" he asks as soon as Haruhiko leaves. The butler looks at him with a bit of a pained face. The man wasn't allowed to say anything of course, so then what did he have to say?

"Haruhiko-sama, I mean master Haruhiko is stepping outside for a bit. He will wait outside untill you are done, sir" Akihiko only nods at that. His thoughts where elsewere already. He saw him again, he saw Angel again.

Akihiko walks around the living room a bit. He could see himself sitting on the couch here, prehaps reading or writing. It smells like cigarette's. that's true, he has been told he smokes. Of course he might have figured out that by himself, since he started wanting one.

The apartment is clean, Akihiko didn't expect that form himself. Maybe he had hired a maid, or someone else to clean. In the back of his mind something tingled. He indeed did have some sort of agreement, he gave something in return for having someone clean, no not just clean but to do all the house chores.

"who cleaned this place?" he finally asks.

But the butler stays quiet. He knows the relationship between his master and the boy, and he hates that he can't say anything about that. He won't say anything, but also he won't lie. He will keep quiet and he won't deny anything, hoping that Akihiko will somehow figure it out on his own. He is a smart man after all.

No answer came form his butler so Akihiko simply continues asking. "who is that boy, the one who was here before?" he asks, but it stays quiet. "he was there when I woke up in the hospital, the first one I saw when I opened my eyes actually."

The silence annoyed Akihiko, maybe even more than his brother annoyed him.

"why won't you answer?" he finally snaps.

"I am not allowed to tell you about that boy, sir" the butler says, finally a quiestion that could make it easy for the butler to give a hint.

Akihiko sighs, of course his father. How he knows it's his father, he doesn't. just his gut telling him. Tired he wants to leave. This place doesn't give him any memories.

Slowly they start to leave.

* * *

***Sooo, i haven't updated this story in a while. I actually started writing this with a need to talk japanese words. Not many people i know speak japanese and it's not like i can do a conversation. I understand a lot, but is stays with that. A bit weird i start with "don't die." But well I watch an anime in which this girl was crying because a friend was dying and blah blah blah blah….***

**Al lot of crap, You DON'T want to read. **

**Oke yes it took me a while, but this weekend I took an hour and came up with the entire plot, also details and events happening and of course the ending and the big mystery what happend to Akihiko. What was his accident?**

**Welll i'll tell you, you find out at the end of this story. So if you really want to know you have to read it untill the end :) also this story might not become that long, i'm planning on finishing this story a quick as possible, because otherwise I will have to many unfinished projects running.**

**Goal: finish this story already.**

**So I'm going to do my best to update a lot and write a lot, so please keep reading and please review.**

**-yuki**


	4. Chapter 3

**thank you for reading my story, and welcome those who are new! please tell me what you think about my story**

* * *

Outside Misaki stopped as soon as he heard his name.

"Takahashi." He turns around and it's Haruhiko. What did he want?

"come with me." The man says when finally standing before Misaki.

"huh?" huh…..eeuhh What?

"I said come with me. Akihiko has completely forgotten about you, he won't care or you anymore. So go out with me and i will show you real love. I love you." A confession. It startels Misaki.

Of course, Haruhiko had told him many time before he loved him. But Misaki had made it clear he loved Akihiko, right? So why was he trying again.

"don't think to long about it, just say yes. I can give you everything you want and I won't forget you like that man." Haruhiko tried to touch Misaki on his shoulder, but Misaki just jumped away.

How could he? It isn't Usagi-san's fault he forgot, and how dare he insult the man?

"h-how… could…. …You." Misaki finally manages to say. He can't get the words he want to say out of his mouth. He kept himself pretty composed, but apperantly seeing Usagi-san, and the man not remembering him, hurt more then he would have thought. he kept everthig help up and didn't let anything out, but now, he could feel tear drops Slowly take form in the corner of his eyes. No he wasn't going to cry. He needs to keep strong.

Haruhiko understands very well the frustration of the young boy, and he knows the insults he gives his brother hurt the boy. He doesn't care about that now.

"just choose me. I won't forget. He won't remeber." Haruhiko tries again, but Misaki won't give up hope.

"what makes you believe that?" Misaki mutters. the brothers don't have anything in commen ecaspt their stupid convidence.

"no, he will, he….. will r-remember." He says in a soft stuttering voice. So cute is the only thing Haruhiko can think of. "he won't, because, H-h –he loves me and I love him TO. One day he will remember" he finishes his sentence.

Haruhiko can only sigh.

"maybe, but who knows you might no longer love him, or worse. He might remember the days he had with you, but during the time he tried to remember he started to like someone else. He might fall out of love with you." Haruhiko doesn't want make Misaki cry, but it happens anyway.

He figures he needs to break the boy a bit, and then comfort him. Help him and send him in the right direction. hurt him slightly. Akihiko now having lost all his memories of Misaki, helps a lot. Misaki will see that Haruhiko can take better care for him, because he loves him.

Indeed, the words hurt, they hurt so much Misaki can't hold it in any longer. He starts to cry. He wants to scream and yell at someone. He wants to be angry at someone, but there is no one to be angry at. Only himself, because he's to blame for what happend. 'If only I could have, no, now is not the time to think about that. What's in the past is done, there's noway to turn that around.' Misaki argues with his own thoughts.

"Misaki" Haruhiko almost whispers his name. The man places his hand on Misaki shoulder. The other he places on his cheeck and cups it. it all makes Misaki sick. He doesn't want this. Not this with this man. No, some one else.

He slaps Haruhiko's hands away. "don't touch me!" he yells.

Wiping his tears Misaki fails to notice Haruhiko coming closer, untill the man wraps his arms around the young boy. "let me go! Didn't I tell you to no touch me!" Misaki yells.

* * *

"sawarena!" some one yells. This voice it's familiar, yes this voice belongs to Angel.

Akihiko quickly leaves the apartment building with the butler following him. Outside he sees Angel, wearing a green shirt and shorts that fall over his knees. He is happily smiling and waving. It's summer.

No it's not, it's winter. What is this? Angel is not smiling, he is not waving. The boy is yelling, yelling at his brother and crying.

Haruhiko's hands approach the boy, and they hug. Somehow it pains Akihiko's chest, his heart is tightly squeezed.

"hanase! mo ita deso, sawarena!" Angel yells and he pushes himself out of Haruhiko's grip. Thank god. Wait? Why? Why am I glad that he rejects my brother? Maybe i hate my brother more than i thought.

Haruhiko wants to say something else, but this time Akihiko won't let him. He steps forward and grabs the arm of his brother.

"i'm ready to go, let's leave." He says.

"U-Usagi-san?" the boy stutters. that is his nickname, right? just what does it mean?

Without noticing Akihiko raises his hand, and touches the teenagers face. Using his tumb to wipe away the tears.

Finally realizing what his hands are doing and how gentle he is with this boy, Akihiko pulls his hand back. Angel looks with his big emerald eyes at him. He stopped crying.

Street lights, also a crying angel. Something happend, but atleast Angel stopped crying.

Are those flashbacks? Akihiko is curious. He has to know, because he knows this boy. This Angel infront of him. He knows him, and he has cried infront of him. So who is he?

"just who are you? What's your name." He says, but the boy can only look confused at him.

"name, tell me your name, Angel." He asks again, but the boy doesn't understand him

"kuso, subekidearu motte iru chuiwoharau Eigo no jugyo, orewa." The boy says, he is obliviously curshing himself, that much Akihiko understands.

"Akihiko we must leave now!" Haruhiko yells. He doesn't want the of them meet properly. He doesn't and so does Fuyuhiko. Well the two wouldn't really meet, but Akihiko will learn the name of his, sort of, former lover. They won't take changes that it may spark between them again.

Without hearing an answer, Akihiko waves goodbye and leaves. Dissapointed.

Leaving Misaki all alone standing on the side walk.

* * *

**Thank you for reading! Here are the translations from the top till the bottom: **

"_**sawarena!" **_**don't touch me (or something that's close to that)**

"_**hanase! mo ita deso, sawarena!" **_** let go of me! I told you already, don't touch me!**

"_**kuso, subekidearu motte iru chuiwoharau Eigo no jugyo, orewa." **_**Dammit, should have paid more attention to English class.**

**P.S. I am not Japanese, and I speak the language very poorly so ofcourse it's possible that the words are wrong, and the grammar is probaly completely off! Yes i know, but let's just pretent it's not for the story, because it's just a fanfic :)**

**Please review**

**-yuki**


	5. Chapter 4

"ow, poor Misaki. We're in the same boat, but you got it a little more rough. Being kicked out of your hoem. Don't worry niisan will take care of you." Again Takahiro, my big idiot but loving brother, is here to talk baby language to me.

Though i know he really cares. After hearing what happened he came over immidaitely, making sure i have a roof above my head. He then heard all my sobs and cries over how i am to blame for all this, but can't do anything to help and set my mistakes right.

The both of us are upset, Usagi-san doesn't remeber either of us. Not me, and the last few years we were together, or nii-san, whom he loved for so many years and sees as a dear friend. All those years are now lost.

There is indeed a chance for Usagi-san to get his memory back. So niisan and I hold on to that hope so tightly, yet tenderly hoping this hope will save us form this situation.

"niisan you don't have to treat me like a little child." I tell my brother like always.

He pulls his hands back and smiles, it's his turn to make dinner so he heads for the kitchen.

Niisan has about a week free of his work. He is here in Tokyo to stay with me for a bit, then after a week he will have to return to his home. Manami, his wife, stayed to home with my cousin, their son. He offerd to take me back to his home to stay, but i refused. I couldn't disturb his loving family home, i can stay on my own i'm old enough.

Besides, how will i be able to cry without worring niisan. How will i let tears fall, which i know i can't hold back, without raising suspicion with niisan. He still doesn't know anything about the relationship i have with Usagi-san.

**Takahiro.**

After poor Misaki had to deliver me the news my best friend has forgotten about me I want to take care of him. After all he is now put out on the streets.

During the day Misaki has class, after calling home I think i will pay Usagi-san a visit. After all the docter said it might help to see or meet things from the past, this way he coudl remeber. Or atleast his body should remeber to some content.

It took me a lot of trouble, more then i thought it would take, but well Usagi-san is a famous writer. However I have manged to find him.

Currently at the hospital for a medical check up.

Somewere around here, if i am correct. Soon i am answered. There in the middle of the hallway is Usagi-san. Together with a docter and another man, dressed in black. Probably someone to attend Usagi-san. Well here goes nothing.

"_well, mr. Usami everything looks alright, are you pracesing with the assingment i gave?" _ the docter speaks in english, I understand a few things but not everything.

"Usagi-san!" I say, well maybe that was a little to happy. Usagi looks up at me, but there is no sign of recognition. Just a cold stare.

I never knew usagi-san had such an unpleasant stare.

"excuse me, are you a friend of Usami-san perhaps?" the docter asks me. His voice brings me back to reality and I finally free myself form Usagi's gaze.

"aah, yes i am. But I heard what happend. He doesn't remember me, right?" hiding my shock of what real state Usagi-san his i give a small laugh.

"well would you perhaps do an assingment with him? It's just simple talk. Talk like you used to talk with him before, talk about topics that he knows about even if he doesn't remember. He might recollect his memory this way." The docter seems very happy with this encouter, though Usagi-san still can only stare at me.

"sure, ofcourse." I yell out of happiness. I get to talk with him, this way i might be able to help.

'might be able to help?' aahh Misaki. "sensei, is it alright if I ask another person to join the talk,? he has been living with Usami-san for the last few years." The docter only nods at this and het hen continues to push Usagi-san to a private room were we can talk.

I pull out my phone and quickly text Misaki.


	6. Chapter 5

**Helloooo, i'm so sorry that i'm not that quick at updating, but thank you fot waiting here is the next chapter :)**

**I want to thank everyone, all of you are my inspiration and just make me smile when I read your reviews. so thank you so much for your support. i will keep on writing, writing with a smile because of some simple reviews, but to me they me a lot.**

**(*note, I have started to work with a beta reader now. the next chapter form my other story 'the Wandering Hangman' will be edited. however I'm not sure wether the next chapters of this story will be edited, but I will asks a beta for help hopes it makes the reading easier )**

**please enjoy**

* * *

I couldn't help but glare at the guy. He gave me so many mixed feelings, that it gets me irretated." Akihiko sits in a wooden chair. A quit old one, probably put back here for storage but was never cleaned. Well the chair works fine, it can hold Akihiko's weight perfectly, it might even hold someone twice his weight.

Akihiko doesn't bother much about the chair, only that it sits uncomfortable. He is to irretated, confused and has many other weird feelings he can't place.

The man he had seen in the hallway made him feel happy with pleasure to see such a smile, sad till the point of heartbroken and also he felt with all of that, that there was no longer any feeling for that man. Something in his life is strong as a brick, so strong that he can be held up, so strong he won't fall down.

"Tanaka, that man just now.." Akihiko starts his sentence, but waits a bit. The butler has now full attention to his master and waits.

"the man that went outside, are you wandering were he might have gone? He sure has been out for a bit. He tol dus he'd be back soon." Tanaka answers when his master doesn't continue.

Yet Akihiko was thinking of asking something else, but he is considering wether or not he could ask his butler.

"no, that's not what I ment. You do have a point though taking his time like this." Akihiko says with a slight irretation towards the man.

Akihiko only came here because he had to get his check up. He would be forced if he didn't go willingly.

When the docter was finally finished, the man kept on talking, talking about things he already knew. That's when the over joyed dark hair man came. Loudly talking "Usagi-san, Usagi-san" is that really a nickname for him? what does it even mean?

"I'm sorry, what did you mean then? Is there anything I can help with?" his butler, Tanaka, asks believing his master has some troubles with his thoughts, or rather memory.

Tanaka has been right next to Akihiko the entire time since Akihiko got released form the hospital. His brother had to get back to work and couldn't be his translator anymore, so Tanaka stepped in. Everyone was more happy with that, neither of the brothers really felt like spending more time together then they had the past days.

"answer two questions for me. What is that mans name?" Akihiko places his chin upon his hands. Waiting for answers, things he can remember form now on. Somehow he feels him eager, nervous and excited to learn these new things. Just like a little child that is discovering his own world.

"the man, sir, is named Takahashi Takahiro. Takahashi is his surname, sir." Tanaka answers. "and what would be your next question?" the butler likes to help out his master like this. Earlier he had already made up his mind to devote himself to help Akihiko-sama regain his memory, yet Haruhiko-sama and Fuyuhiko-sama told Tanaka that somethings are better to never remeber again. Like the boy, Misaki. If he drops that name, he would be fired immidaitly. However nothing was said about the rest the Takahashi family, nor the enviroment of Misaki. Tanaka dropped a few hints the past days.

Two days ago when he accompanied Akihiko into the city fors ome shopping. The man had been utterly bored so when they past a bakkery some ideas formed in his head.

"Tanaka? Are you hungry?" Akihiko had asked when Tanaka was standing still infront of the window display.

"o no, sir, I am not. I was just thinking that it's nice to cook, right? A home cooked meal is by far the best." Tanaka had taken notes when he met Misaki for the first time, afterall even if Akihiko didn't live in the house, looking after the entire Usami family was his job.

"is it? the cook at home doesn't really make standard home made meals, but they are still pretty good." Akihiko replied bluntly.

This was proven to be hard. Akihiko is a smart person, but sometimes everyone can miss the simple small hints or clues we're looking for.

"yes, but I remember you have told me that you had wished for a more average home, with home made meals." Tanaka said.

This made Akihiko think. Keeping that thought in mind he is indeed quit intrested in ho wan average family would be. All coming home and being greeted by your family members, and when the evening falls mother puts a warm dinner on the table. Nothing specail, but a dinner filled with love. How lovely that would be.

Akihiko kept quite after that and the two man just continued their walk. This time Tanaka happy that he might have managed to push Akihiko in the right direction.

"Takahiro." Akihiko speaks softly, it's only ment to be for himself just to let the name roll over his tougne. "what does Usagi-san mean?" the second question Akihiko asks.

Tanaka stares at Akihiko, then he plainly answers: "rabbit."

* * *

**Thank you for reading :) and please review.**

**-yuki**


	7. Chapter 6

**So here is the next chapter, i suddenly had a writting urge so i just kept on writting the entire evening. Which is good for, because you have more to read now :) **

**Soo i'm very sorry for all the bad grammar, and i will tell once more, I know a little bit japanese and the japanese i know is used in this story, but the grammar has probably more faults then the entire english chapter. Just use your imagination to pretend it's all correct ? :) **

**Also the most inspartion i got from music, so for those who want to I recommend that when you get to the end you could listen to a song called "here with you". It's a songtrack of an anime mirai nikki**

**Please enjoy**

* * *

"niisan, why did you call me out all of the sudden like that. I was still busy with my part-time job."

About half a hour ago Takahiro had called his little brother and told him to come over, but he didn't say why. The reason he had to come was going to be a surpirse. Takahiro just wants to make his brother smile. After the incedent with Akihiko hitting his head like that the boy had been pretty upset.

"aah, Misaki you're here. I'm sorry for the sudden call, but I thaught that you might want to come today." Takahiro says as he tries not to reveal anything yet.

"just come inside, I hope it's a nice surpirse for you." The last part is said in a soft voice and more directed towards Takahiro himself.

"huh? Did you say something?" Misaki noticed his brother talking to himself, a habit he has. A habit they both have.

The two go inside. Walking through a few hallways and passing eqaul many people as doors of rooms.

"I met up with some people and we were about to talk and sort of catch up with each other." Takahiro says as the keep moving their legs across the floor. "and then I thought it would be nice i you're there. We can have a very pleasant afternoon." Takahiro stands still infront a room.

"niisan, who are we going to meet…." Misaki barely finishes his sentence, because his brother has already opened the door and Misaki can see who they are meeting.

"Usagi-san…." Misaki just says the name as a reaction to his surprise.

"yeah, I met him earlier in the hallway the docter say it might be a good idea to talk to him, it might help him remember things." Takahiro says a little to overjoyed like he is most of the time.

* * *

Akihiko hears voices and then the door opens. Takahiro stands in the doorway, and not far behind him is 'that' boy.

" suwatte mimashou." Takahiro says.

Mesmerizing green eyes never leave the sight of Akihiko as the boy enters. The same for Akihiko, his eyes can't believe it, the wait was more then worth it. he is meeting this boy again.

"Angel ?" Akihiko says. He had failed to notice the silence in the room, so when he spoke all eyes turned to him.

"nani ka ita desu?" the boy asks.

"aah, Usagi-san, kare wa itta 'Tenshi', demo…" Takahiro speaks some japanese words, probably to explain something, but more Akihiko can't guess. "kare wa ita 'anata wa tenshi.'" He then says.

"eeeh? Naze watashi wa tenshi?" the boy says.

The two keep talking back and fort so Akihiko turns towards Tanaka. "what are they saying? Please translate."

"yes sir." Tanaka replies. "Takahiro translate the word 'Angel' for the younger boy. Sir, you named that boy Angel, right?" Tanaka asks and Akihiko simply nods.

"well, the younger boy is just wondering in what way and why he could bes een as an angel." Tanaka's voice makes the other two man stop talking. They listen to Tanaka explain.

"well, I do agree with Usagi-san." Takahiro stutters in his best english. "He has been Angel to me, always." He says and then smile. If only the man knew how stupid his english sounds, but the man tries his best. He probably does know, but he just doesn't care.

"sono 'agree' doi sure, niisan nani ita no?" the boy pouts.

_Yes indeed he give a pouting lip and straigents his arms besides his body._

"_Usagi-san, Usagi-san, finish your work already, Aikawa is close to her breaking point."_

Just now, Akihiko rememberd some japanese. He could understand it all. He could remember it so clearly.

Angel standing in the front of him as he was seated on a sofa. They're inside the apartment and Angel was busy cooking. He nags and lectures Akihiko about some work, but it doesn't matter. The woman's name, the other details. Even though he can remember them, they don't matter. The boy, Angel he does.

"Akihiko-sama?"

"Usagi-san?" Akihiko can hear voices and looks up to their sorce. He is squatting down on the ground and holding his head. It hurt. his head hurts, but the pain almost fades as his Angel gives such a concerned yet warm look.

His hands on his shoulder his green eyes big with worry.

"daisjobu Usagi-san? Kao warujo" he says. His voice sounds nice and sweet.

Name, he can't no longer go without it. Akihiko must know.

"please, pleas tell me your name, i must know." Akihiko holds the shoulders of his Angel in a thight grip and won't let go.

Like in the hospital when he first laid eyes on him, or outside his apertment. he won't let go af Angel this time, not untill he has an answer.

"Akihiko !?" Takahiro yells out. He is surprised by the sudden reaction of Akihiko, grabbing a hol don his brother like that.

"please I beg of you tell me your name." Akihiko now to starts to raise his voice like Takahiro.

"Akihiko." The name echo's through the room. It's not Angel who speak, but the two others. Angel just looks at him, he stares at him right in the eye and Akihiko keeps begging.

Angel wants to close his eyes to avoid the painful look in Akihiko's eyes. His strong hands squeesing their nails into his shoulders. He just doesn't understand what is being said. Is Akihiko angry at him?

"Tanaka, please translate it for them." Akihiko turns his attention to the butler, but he keeps his mouth shut and looks down.

"Tanaka please, just tell me his name. I need to know who this boy is." But Tanaka still won't answer. He just hides his eyes. The butler is forced not to tell anything. Even if revealing the boy's name would help him regain his memory, if Tanaka wants to keep an eye on the young master, Akihiko-sama, he should keep quiet.

Thinking reasonable, what difference could one name make?

"please, i'm missing this one piece of the puzzle I must know." Akihiko now yells, but still won't let go of the green eyed Angel.

Nurses opened the door. They were walking in the hallway when they heard the yelling voices.

"nani ga okotte iru ?" one of them asks, but the two nurses and man behind them are completly ignored.

"please, how can I asks you to give me your name?" Akihiko begs. he feels like breaking down and crying, he is that desperate.

"Akihiko." A stern voice says. It's Haruhiko, here to pick up his brother that is taking to long for just a check up. He, as well, is being ignored.

"name, just tell me your name. What name do I place with these green eyes? By what name do I call this sweet and warm angel?" Akihiko falls to his knees, but doesn't let go. He doesn't loosens his grip even a bit.

"Akihiko, that's enough we're going home!" Haruhiko now yells.

"name, name, please. Your NAME. NAMI-IWA!" Akihiko yells. He can feel himself break, he did i the said it right, right?

Silence, no one moves. Everybody holds their breath. What to do now. Haruhiko wants to get Akihiko out of there before it's to late, but he already is to late.

"Misaki." A smile appears on Akihiko's face. Misaki, Misaki, Misaki. That's the name. Never again will he let that go.

Uncontrolably tears fall down his cheecks. He smile, even though he cries. It looks ridiculous, but hasn't got a care in the world for that. "Misaki…" Akihiko says finally calmed down.

His grip loosens and he feels extremly tired. He can't even resigster before he has fallen down on the ground.

A second passes before everybody starts to react. One nurse runs out to get a docter. Whil the other stays by Akihiko's side.

They turn him to lay on his back, and the nurse checks his heartbeat. Shock and panic weigh heavily in the room.

"sinanaide….." Misaki sits down next to Akihiko. "Sinanaide, onegai. joda dewanai, mabute o agate, Usagi-san. Sinanaide." Misaki feels so scared. Just like on that day, in the apartment. All the blood increasing a Akihiko had hit his head. The entire thing was his fault. He rememberd how scared he was, but it doesn't compare to now. Tears flow down Misaki's cheeks, he did nothing but hurt and endanger Akihiko. The man must not die, he can't die. Not now not here.

"Usagi-san!"

"shh." Misaki's eyes shot open. Akihiko lays a finger on his lips. "watashi shinuso."

* * *

" suwatte mimashou." = well, sit down (let's sit down)

"nani ka ita desu?" = what is said/ what did he say (something like that)

"aah, Usagi-san, kare wa itta 'Tenshi', demo…" = aah, usagi-san said 'Angel', but ('but'as in not sure about the situation)

"kare wa ita 'anata wa tenshi.'" = he said 'you are an Angel. (this sentence and the one above are together: "he said angel, but i believe he means it as in you are an angel"

"eeeh? Naze watashi wa tenshi?" = huh why am i an angel?

sono 'agree' doi sure, niisan nani ita no?"= that word 'agree' agree, what are you talking about brother (Misaki understood the word 'agree from the english and won't really accept the compliment because he is shy, that's why he starts to pout when his brother agrees with Akihiko.

"daisjobu Usagi-san? Kao warujo" = are you alright Usagi-san? Your face looks bad (as in looks sick)

NAMI-IWA (namiiwa) = naam (but i'm guessing you could figure that on out form the text itself.)

(after that comes the whole part were Misaki is yelling, basically he is yelling: "don't die, please don't die. it's not a joke, open your eyes please don't die.)

"watashi shinuso." = i won't die

**So those are all the translations, thank you very much for reading and thank you for your tim****e.**

**I know I said i wanted to finish this story quickly and focus on other project, because i just started this on a whim. Just one sentence and it became a whole story. Maybe i will take some longer time on this, because i just don't want this to be rushed. **

**So thanks again and please tell me what you thought about it, please review **

**-yuki**


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